Part 2: Anime Kururugi Falls Into a Hole

♫ "Map"



Alright, this time we're gonna figure out what the heck is goin' on here. Wanna go home.

♫ "Kaede's Village"



This is extremely not home.

Finally, we've arrived. This is Kaede's Village.

It can't be...a horse?



Have you seen those things? Their legs are fingers!

But...



Nope, it's Ohio. The kimonos gave it away.

What are you thinking about? If you don't hurry, I'll leave you behind.



???: Inuyasha!

This voice clip is not given a text box or anything, which is odd because this is really the only time it happens.

♫ "Comical Scene"





This girl looks quite cross and is also given a full body sprite sweep, which also never really happens again.

Hey, Inuyasha! Where have you been?

Yep, it's Kagome!

There was a demon outside of the village and we needed your help to defeat it. You're never there when we need you.





Now with two sprites!

Hey, who are you?

Oh yeah, this kid was being chased by one of the small demons, so I stepped in.

Oh, great! Where am I? This is Japan, right? There's horses, and weird hairstyles, and even demons! My cell doesn't work, there's no police stations, no cars, no convenience strores. Not even a supermarket.



Listen, I know you're a time traveler, but you're being pretty glib about our distress right now and I don't appreciate it.

I don't know why, but you were sure excited.

I'm sorry. I was so happy, cuz I thought I had found a normal person.

That's understandable, but please calm down.

All this dialogue being voiced really hammers in how badly written/localized it is.



I think you've come from the present.

Yeah, you know. The present!

Yes. I fell through a hole in the storage house and all of a sudden I was in the woods.

I see. Okay, I need you to listen to me carefully. This isn't the present.

I think we knew that from the acknowledgement that the present was something we could be from here.

Not the present? Then where am I?

Wait, then what was that "Yes" earlier?!

This is the Feudal era.

The feudal era?! The time of Nobunaga Oda and when guns first came to Japan?

Yes, I'm sure it's surprising. But it's true.

It can't be.

I couldn't believe it at first either.

But, I've only read about the feudal era in my textbooks. This is absurd.

Yes, that's right.

What?

I was even attacked by demons.

I see. Are you hurt?

I'm fine.

This village is safe. You can stay here for a while.

Thank you. I'm really glad you're here. If you weren't, I don't know what I'd do.



Don't be rude. You'd be bawling too, if you had to go through all that.

Eh... Reminds me of someone else that cries all the time.

What do you mean by that?

Me? Always mad? Yeah right.

See, you're mad right now. You're so short-tempered.



You guys really get along, huh?

Hey, Anime, it's rude for a stranger to comment on romantic tension, okay?

What?

Hey what are you saying? Who does she think she is. [sic]

Oh, stop it.

Don't be shy.

Incredibly rude.



Why?

Don't you want to go back?

That's right.

What do you mean?



That's how I got here.

That's awful convenient.

You mean...

You may be able to go back if you pass through there.

Wow! Really?! Please take me there!

Okay. It's on the eastern outskirts of this village.



♫ "Kaede's Village"

Kagome is absorbed into Anime and we head on our way.



On our way, we find this farmer who tells us about the mysterious field. This is about the only sidequest in the game. Over the course of the game, we'll receive different seeds and fertilizers, which we can combine at this field. Different combinations will yield different crops. Most combinations will give you different items, but there are special combinations that provide special scenes, which is probably your main goal. I'll try to get as many as I can, but a lot of this stuff is easily missable, and the reward isn't particularly interesting most of the time. Also, it's not really worth starting on until later in the game, so we'll get there when we get there.



There's some NPCs and another screen and neither are interesting.

♫ "Cutscene 1"





It looks really old. Almost like demons could come out of it.

Oh so now we're an expert.

Yeah, it does.



Hey, don't say that. You're going to scare them.

Did not want to program and record two lines.

Whatever. The demons were dead anyway.

You know what I mean, Inuyasha. You're so insensitive. Sorry, Anime.

I never introduced myself.



Yeah. If you jump in, it should take you right back to the present.

Jump in?





What are you scared of?

THE DEMON CORPSES



Here I go. One, two...th-th...





AND HE PUSHES US IN.

Huh?



Well, I'd like to thank you for joining me to revisit this unsung classic. It's pretty short, but it doesn't overstay its welcome. Goodnight everyone.



oh wait

Ouch! I don't think so.

♫ "Comical Scene"



Wow, you two look great for it being like 500 years in the future.



I couldn't help it.

What if she got hurt?

Shut up! I was just helpin' out.

What?! How's that?

Excuse me?

What?

Can you stop fighting and help me. [sic]



I'm startin' to think...

...this ain't the present.

I don't know why, but you can't seem to get through.

Yeah.

Don't worry. I'm sure there is another way.

Okay. But what do I do now?

Well, Kaede helped me out when it was my turn.

Who's Kaede?



But she's always nagging me.

Only because you're always getting into trouble.

Well, I don't really understand, but she doesn't sound like a bad person. I'd like to meet her.

Okay, let's go. She lives on the west side of the village square.



And go we did, directly to the left of the first screen of the village.

This is Priestess Kaede's house.



Okay, I know this wasn't exactly a AAA game, but this is pretty lazy.

Hmmm?

What?! There's two of you, Kagome?!

???: [In a decidedly not Kagome voice] Kagome's back!

So Kagome has a twin?

???: Twins? What are you saying?



Hey, behave yourself Shippo.



I should note that the voice acting says "What is SHE supposed to think" instead of "one."

♫ "Comical Scene"





A child!

What happened? Kagome turned into a child!



Transformation? How can you do that? Are you pulling my leg?

You use the art of transformation when you want to trick someone.

I feel like we are having different conversations.

I see.

DO YOU?

So what's your name? My name is Anime. I came from the present, like Kagome.

My name's Shippo. Are you Kagome's friend?

Um, not really.

I thought Kagome brought you from the well.

I wish.

Seems like you've got a problem.

Yes. You seem really calm, even though you're a kid.

I have literally no idea what these people are talking about half the time.



Don't be such a smart-aleck.

What did you say, Inuyasha?



We're going to Kaede's house, right?

Cut it out, Shippo.

*Whap!*



That's it. Inuyasha, sit!



Hey, what was that? Wow, Kagome!

This is the power of Priestess Kaede. Come on, let's go talk to Kaede.

Okay.





Um, hello. My name is Anime.

From the look of your clothes, I guess you came from the same place as Kagome.

Yes.

You can relax. No one's going to eat you.

...Okay?

Um...I was looking for something in the storehouse, when I suddenly blacked out. When I came to, I was in this world.

Technically the same world, just a different time, but I get you.

I would like to go home. Can you please tell me how to do that?

Hmm, you want to go home. I thought you were Kagome's friend. It seems like a difficult situation. Tell me your story from the beginning.



And then I said Shippo was really calm for a kid. I dunno why I said that, it didn't make much sense and wasn't really germane to the situaiton.



The well didn't work.

Well? The Bone-Eater's Well?



Okay, if this line seems weird, then you're absolutely right. Anime should be saying this. It's not only mistakenly attributed to Kagome, but if you watch the video, you will see that it is also mistakenly voiced by Kagome's actress. This is one of the main pieces of evidence that Bandai just did not care on either side of the Pacific, because it would be EXTRA EFFORT to add this mistake into the localization, which means it must have been in the Japanese version. Which means that this line went from script to VO booth without anyone noticing, TWICE.

Amazing.

UPDATE: It's been brought to my attention that Kagome's weird line is in fact a mistranslation. In Japanese, often the subject of a sentence is omitted if the context can be inferred. As you can see, this is what happened. I suspect that the localization team did NOT have this context and mistranslated the subject as being Kagome herself.

I see.

Do you know why I can't get through? I really wanna go home.

Hmm. Unfortunately, I don't know why.

But...please, you've got to help me.

Hmmm, I don't know how I can help...

I just don't know what to do.

Gosh, I feel for you.

Yeah.

You mean I can't get home? Mom... Dad...

On the one hand, everyone I've ever known and all the conveniences of modern life that I've come to depend on are centuries away.

On the other hand, no Twitter.



...



Whatever. It's not like she's gonna die if she can't get home.

That's true, but you could be a little nicer.

Kagome. Inuyasha. Stop fighting.

It's super fine, little dude.

Being nice isn't gonna find the way home. I fyou wanna go home, you need to find a way to do that.

Find a way?

Is that what you're trying to say, Inuyasha?

Well, what else?

...I guess I won't get anywhere by being upset.

You can be upset anytime you want.

Okay, I'll just have to keep trying.



That's enough, Inuyasha.

He's not actually being that mean.



you might as well stay here with Inuyasha and everyone else.

Yay like an anime!

What? Now that's going a little too far.

Oh, I couldn't...

Anime, we literally have nowhere else to go. Take the fuckin' offer.

Wait a minute, Inuyasha. Just like when Kagome arrived in this world, This is no trivial matter either. [sic]

So what?

If something should happen it would be better if you were together.



Fine. Whatever.



Yes. Thank you so much.

It's decided then. Let's go listen to the village gossip. Maybe we'll find a clue from something we hear.

Okay.



Now we're back in gameplay, and what we're supposed to do here...is a bit unclear.



I've always just kinda assumed it's talk to everyone in town, which is...well, a shitty way to design a game.



But it's also not entirely reliable. So I just kinda go back and forth for a while talking to people until I get results. It's not interesting and nobody has anything to say.







Well, screw you too.



Halfway through, we get a little scene.

I agree, but we don't have any clues...

Hmm, I don't know.

It would help if you had seen anything out of the ordinary.

Hey, something's bothering me. Why couldn't you use the Bone-Eater's Well, but Kagome could?

Well, I know. Probably because I didn't get here through the Bone-Eater's Well.

That would mean that there's something like the Bone-Eater's Well near where you first woke up, don't you think?



Yeah. But I can't remember where that was now. I was frantically trying to run away at the time.

What a scardy cat. [sic]



And back to wandering until we head back to the Well.



If someone had been with you at the time, we could ask them. But you were alone, weren't you?

Yes. Oh yeah, I met a bunch of strange villagers near there. They were all desperately looking for something.

They also tried to kill you.

Well, then, we should ask them.

Not a good idea, maybe.

Or at least they may have seen something that could give us a clue.

Yes. When I came into this world, they were nearby.

Alright, let's go look for those villagers.

Then we head back to the town square to finish this thing.



Yes, we have. But I haven't seen anyone that looks like those villagers.



Oh! There's a village nearby? It could be the people from there. Is Akebi Village near here?

Yes, it's not that far, but...

But...

But there's all kinds of demons on the road going there.

He's right. Demons come after you even if you're only a little ways from the village.



Yes, so you need to be careful.

As long as I'm with you, you've got nothin' to worry about from those demons.

That's right.

Heheheh.

Yeah, you've got no brains, but plenty of brawn!

Shut up, Shippo!



Cut it out, Inuyasha!

Come to think of it, you two are demons.



It's very surprising. I thought all demons were scary. And here we are all together.

Inuyasha isn't really a demon.

That's enough, Kagome.

But...

It's okay Kagome. I'm not too concerned with that kind of thing. Do you think you could take me to the next village?

Of course we can. Let's all go to Akebi Village. But we should prepare for our trip before we go.

That's a good idea. The road there is pretty rugged.

Okay, let's go shopping first.



There isn't anything that we need.

Hey, you're the one that's always complaining about not having this or that.



It's a store. You know 'em.



I'm not gonna buy anything right now, though. This game is very easy.



And with all that questionably-written exposition out of the way, the adventure begins! Next time.

Chapter 2 Highlight Reel